Politics that roots deep

Edit Post: With whatever intention the article was written, and whatever it meant to convey, has been explained by me in the second comment. I don't want anyone to misinterpret what i have written.

Family, in this post doesn’t represent my father, mother or brother. It is the whole big, fat and huge collection of Uncles and Aunties. In short, family members from both sides. Both, paternal and maternal.

The most frequent question I’m being hounded by my family members these days is, ‘ Tanu! Tum to India aaoge nai ab?’ now, I don’t have any problems whatsoever with this question, but with the pure malicious intent it is thrown at me. It is extremely irritating. Family is a good thing to have, and that too with such a big family as mine who ‘assume’ are pretty well connected with each other. So what they bitch at their own relatives back, so what if they smile at you and leave no chance of passing tones of sarcasm, so what if any achievement of some one else’s son becomes a bone of contention for them, but they fake it so well. One moment they bitxh about another relative and next moment they meet as if they are lost sisters meeting again after centuries. Any amount of achievement meets their scrutiny,

‘ Arre xyz ka ladka? Haan Haan uska to admission donation se hua hai’ ,
‘ Abc ko to boards me sirf 85% hi aaya hai’.
‘ Accha college kya hai? Bahut mahenga hai, wahan to bas paisa waala log padhta hai’,
'Dekho ABC kaise poore parivaar ka naam hansaya hai. Love marriage kiya na. Punjabi hai ladki, pata hai aapko? Inter Caste’

These are some of the comments you can easily hear (or overhear) by some of the family members whose sole purpose of life is to bitch, bitch, bitch. I mean even after their own relatives. Bloody family politics and back biting is their favorite game and their favorite venue is Shaadis, any festival where the family get together happens or even generally. When they meet anyone after a long time. Who needs a reason to bitxh? I’m not saying they bitch about me or something. And even if they bitch, I xare two hoots. They bitxh, is the thing that bothers me. I mean what kind of a family we are trying to build? No. correct that. What kind of family THEY are trying to build? And most importantly, they sometimes criticize about other family members in front of their children thus, prejudicing their children’s mind also.

So, coming back to me going to Um-rika, that is the best way they would pronounce it. The most common and famous question being asked as aforementioned is Are you going to settle there? And it irritates me. They say, ‘tumko to kabhi bihar aur India se lagaav shuru se nai raha hai.’ Now, since even I have to fake that I respect them, I keep quite. I can answer it now. Yes, I don’t have much attachment with Bihar, any would be a wrong word. Because, first of all I hate the stereotyped Biharis. I hate them from the core of my heart. Having said that, my father, my brother doesn’t fall into that category and thankfully I have not grown under that upbringing. I don’t know why, but I don’t xonnext with that kind of a mentality somehow. It is difficult for me. I may be writing shit right now. Whatever. These Biharis have a fixed and a very narrow mindset and I hate them for that. I hate them for not being able to speak English that fluently (Yes. It is a MAJOR factor, inspired by Agastya Sen or whatevr you may wish to think), they are still like 150 years behind, speaking and following a goddamn rudimentary set of beliefs, still besotted with IIT, Medixal, Brahmin-Brahmin marriages, My-Son-gets-more-salary than yours mentality and I hate it. I am urban, I don’t bitxh about anyone in the family (at least people who I love really),I am English and I want to hang around with people who harbor the similar mentality. Now, this doesn’t mean that I don’t like anyone in the family. Infaxt, it is incorrect, I simply adore some of the people of my family. I love them. I respect them. That is what respect is all about. It should come from within. Respect is not about grabbing any elder’s feet and ‘Pranam’ing thme. That is pure bullshit. Real respect and love comes from inside. There is a certain kind of connection with certain people. And with certain people there si not, no matter how good/bad they are or appear to be.

Coming again to answer those kinds of people, whatever attachment I have from my country is difficult for them to understand. Not, difficult. Impossible. So just leave it at that. Sometimes, this politics and bitxhing of people make you really sick and sometimes I want to run away from it. That is why; I think people who are settled abroad are the luckiest. Because, they are oblivious from the muddy slingshots of the so called ‘Happy Family’ whine. And I have always felt that life is so smooth away from the eyes of those ‘prying cynics’ who are reverently referred to as ‘Relatives’.